“Trotamundos,” 6 channel video installation, 2023, 06:56

TIn the last year, I have met many people who were astonished that I moved to Murray, Kentucky, having lived in Los Angeles and being born and raised in Mexico City. This video installation is a way for me to make sense of my emotions and psyche after this journey and how it has changed me. I walk through landscapes in the different cities that have influenced me in a cyclical motion. During the video, the relationship between the male gaze (which the camera represents) and myself is questioned since I am the subject and the author of this narrative as well. There are pauses where phrases like “¿qué me ves? ” or “what are you looking at?” disrupts the landscape. Artifacts, like the glasses, reminiscent of Hollywood, change meaning through time, but are still iconic representations of hiding one’s true nature. Artificial deer antlers and capullos on the ankles represent traditions of the deer hunting culture. The capullos are part of the danza del venado (deer dance), one of the oldest religious rituals from the northern part of Mexico performed by hunters. In ancient Mexico City, the Mexicas used it to represent the female energy from the sun. Currently, there is an effort in Mexico to recover traditions, and people are learning these dances from elders and from video recollections. I question how the media changes my understanding of the past and how it also informs my present. In this video, my gaze, which provides agency, ends with the cycle of the camera’s voyeuristic look. I am interested in getting out of the gender power dynamics instead of working within it. As Los Fabulosos Cadillacs say in a song, “no importa el destino, lo que importa es el camino,” paraphrasing T.S. Eliot; “It’s the journey, not the destination that matters.”